Fukutaichou Ise Nanao

I think that when I buy a house, I'm just going to pay someone to stage my house for me.  I spent almost all day today wandering around with my mom through three different furniture stores, all with old ladies trying to get us to buy hideous doilies, all with young, desperate men trying to refinance something, all needing to be fended off.

And I did it all on heels.

While we were there, I was looking around for some furniture for my room, since even though our addition is done, it's is the most sparsely filled space anywhere... except for within my sister's head of course.  Anyways, as I was browsing through the wardrobes, this guy who looked about my age came over behind me.  I hadn't noticed him, and I think he meant for me to turn around and be right up close to him.  Instead, I noticed a fold out door on the wardrobe, yanked it open, and suddenly I hear this yelp from behind me. 

So when I turn around, there's this guy clutching his nose and tearing up while trying to look nonchalent, which I appriciate since I have had my fill of guys being pissed at me.  Instead, after we've gone through all this crap about me being sorry and him being forgiving, he asks me if he can help me with anything.  I kinda look at him and go, "You work here?" in a really surprised voice, because he doesn't look old at all.  But he nods and offers to show me around the store, so I start to follow him when suddenly a uniformed guy comes running around the corner, sees us, and starts screeching,

"JARED!" and running at us. 

And I'm just like, are you shitting me?

Turns out, this guy I was talking to was some runaway who'd stolen his parent

I, as a post-it note for when I later right my last will and testament, vow here and now to never have children.

NEVER, EVER, EVER.  I would end up killing them within a week of them being able to walk.  Camp Invention is finally over, and it couldn't have ended more badly... or more wonderfully.  I'll make a list for those love-hate relationship virgins.

BAD

1. I failed to get the hot concealer's number... or to make a move... or to generally tell him I was interested.  What was more annoying then that was that one of the junior councilors, who was going into seventh fucking grade, was hanging off him like some sort of leprosy skin result.  She was always hanging out with him instead of her assigned councilor, Beth, who as a result, has decided never to return to the camp because she had such a hard time controlling her group.  And then she kept saying that the kids were saying that the guy had a crush on her, which was complete bull.  He's four years older then her, so i'm pretty sure they'd be illegal or something anyways.  Maybe I'm just jealous, because it feels like I barely got a chance at him.  I only got to really talk to him during breaks, and he did laugh at my joke comments at things, but he seemed so much more guarded around me than her, so maybe i'm jealous.

Maybe that's why I tripped her and didn't feel bad when she dropped all the water ballons she was carrying.

2. The kids were just as anxious as me to get out of there.  Today was the worst because almost none of them would listen, they were all over the place, and I was about to develope an infection from where i'd been pulling out all my hair.  There was only one kid in my group who I'd been having problems with, Will, and today was his worst day.  I ended up taking him out of reccess because he dumped a bottle of water on another kid by "accident".  Hah, accident my ass.  Then, afterwards, he was just a pain because he was being a demanding little brat who didn't seem to know the meaning of the work fucking PLEASE. <well, please, not fucking please, because that wouldn't really help him>

3. I left my lunch box there.

GOOD

1. Camp is over, and I can finally catch up on my sleep... wait fuck, no I can't.  5:30 am spinning class tomorrow because I'm a dumbass and let my mom sign us up.  I swear, if I end up next to that peppy woman one more time, I'll snap.  But camp is over.

2. And it came with a paycheck.  I was supposed to get $175 for the week, because its a rule that you have to participate in camp for two years before that number increases, however, all the staff agreed that I'd done really well and had taken on a lot of resposibility this year (!!!) and gave me a raise.  So the check that's being mailed to me is the happy supplier of $225.  So, my first job, my first promotion, my first raise, all in four days.  It's pretty intense.

Maybe I'll use the cash to find out the coucilor's cell phone number?

Anywho, guess who I literally ran into at the grocery store the other day?  You guessed it, Cameron, the football player I fell on in gym class, who I met when I flattened him with my grocery cart trying to beat this woman to the last spraycan of Oust in the cleaning aisle.  He just appeared around the corner, and

FLATTEN (which is a sucky onomoapea, but it describes things deliciously)

He was flat on his back looking at all the boxes of diet soday that were piled on the bottom shelf of my cart.  So after and hauled the buggy of his chest, he got up, brushed off his pants, and recoginised me.  You should have seen his face, it complete iced over.  I'm pretty sure it made me constipated, because it was like he was trying to fry my brain with his look.  And let me tell you, it's scary to know there's someone out there that dislikes you that much, especially when they're the school quaterback, coveted by women, like by all.  But anyways, he goes,

"Well, this is unexpected if not surprising since it's you." and then i really floor him (haha) with my brilliant comeback

"Huh?"

"You are seriously a danger to everyone around you." and goes to walk off, but tripped over one of the sodas that had fallen of my cart.

And do you know what?

He wears purple and gold boxers.

Well, howdy-doody everyone.  My time schedule is off enough that I'm awake enough to type this after my FIRST DAY OF WORK!!! :D  Yes, this summerI got my first job at a summer camp for kids, and I'm in charge of all the little ones going into first or second grade, where they're young enough that they're loud, but not intentionally obnoxious.  In fact, I'm already a little attached to them.  And of course, one of the major perks to this is that I get $175 for the week, just in time for my trip to Florida, for which my mom and I leave for on the 30th.

However, that is not the reason for today's heading.  No instead it is in representation of all the perverted scenarios my imagination could provide me with concerning my fellow councellor, who looks a year or two older then me and is the son of my fifth grade teacher.  It was like when I first met him, I was like, oh he's cute, but I'm too busy and nervous to worry about him right now.  Now, however, it feels like I'm analyzing everything he says to me, looking for signs that he's interested, and what sux is that I have no way to ask if he has a girlfriend or anything, because i'm not asking him and DEFINATELY not his mom.

But damn!!! *drool*

Also, my dad and I are going on a diet together, where you eat as little carbs as possible to empty your fat content into your bloodstream where it's cleaned from your body, so as long and I don't mess up AT ALL I can lose up to 10lbs. a week!  I'm so pumped, i might be able to lose a few lbs. before Florida :D

Oh, I'll keep blogging while I'm there, and maybe i'll even figure out how to upload pics so that you guys can get a glipse of me and my fab life... at my grandma's house -.-

don't expect much.

ciao loves, until next time!

Okay, well, it's been a ridiculously long time since I updated. I am exactly one week into my summer vacation.  Here are a couple updates.

First of all, Caro and Abby are fighting.  Abby thought Caro was being to clingy and wouldn't talk to her, and Caro didn't really get why.  So I ended up being the one to explain it to her, which got her mad.  It weird, because I don't really understand why Abby is mad and refusing to be friends with Caro at all, but now Caro is pissed because of it.

Secondly, I have a week-long geometry preview which started monday and ends friday (for me).  It's supposed to go through next week too, but I can't come (see update #3).  It's not that bad, though.  There are two other girls and two boys.  They all seem to know each other, but they're friendly enough.

Third, I have a brief summer job.  For one week, I'm going to be a couselor at Camp Invention!  I get $175 for the week, and there's a 'staff meeting' tomorrow from 10-1.

Fourth, I might have strep throat. I've been sick since early Monday morning, with a fever of 102.  The fever's gone, but now I have headaches and a reaaaaaly sore throat.  We're going to the doctor this morning to see.  If I do, then I'm contagious and

1. can't go to math

2. can't go to swim team (oh yeah, that started yesterday too. man, have i gotten out of shape :P)

3. can't go to my staff meeting

4. might not be able to go to camp invention >:O

5. get disgusting medicine that probably won't do anything until my next lifetime

so yeah, as you can see, if I do have strep throat, I'm going to be pissed. I'll update about that later.

11:48 am

Okay, so I don't have strep, thank god.  After sticking his stethascope down my bra, the doctor stuck a swab down my esophagus and said I was clear and to take so tylenol.  So now I'm at him getting ready for math at 2pm and wishing there was some food in the house cause I haven't eaten yet.  You know what sux even more? I started my period today :P  so I feel like craaaaaaaap.  I'm gonna go find som potahtoe chips. I might post again later today depending.

Okay, first of all, sorry that it's taken so long for me to update.  I've been everywhere recently, and yet it feels like nothing has been accomplished.  What the hell is that?

To begin with, today was my orchestra  auditions, but I didn't even get to finish my piece (appparently this isn't unusual) and wasn't even able to get to the best part that I was really good at.  Which really pisses me off, because I spent ages on it. 

Assholes.

Secondly, I finally updated my CSI:Miami fanfiction, but while all my other chappies got about 7 reviews, this one has gotten two.  In the plot, it took a serious twist and readers got to see another side of one of the previously evil characters.  What's bothering me is that no one is reviewing, and I can't tell if it's just because they're not, or if they hate it.  WHY THE FUCK DOES EVERYONE FEEL THE NEED TO JUST STAY SILENT????????????

If you don't like something, why can't you just say it?  If someone tells a bad joke just to hear themselves talk, why does everyone force themselves to laugh?  When someone's being an asshole to another person, why does everyone else just observe from a distance?  Have people just become that weak willed, or is it just that they believe that is what society expects of them?  Because let me tell you, if someone was wailing on me, I'd sure as hell expect someone to help me out instead of just walking past or dropping the occassional comment.

And for some reason, even though two of my friends just left my house half an hour ago, I feel ridiculously lonely.  I feel so distant with Caro and Abby, my two closest friends.  Like I'm seeing things through an entirely different lense and can't make sense of them.  Some days I just feel so tired of them, like the more deeply I involve myself, to longer I'll have to spend on something that's only holding me back.  It's like everyone in my school is part of a giant puzzle, and I'm the last piece that you can't get to fit right because it actually belongs to a whole different set.  But you keep trying to jam it in, hoping that it will suddenly reveal itself and go along with everything else.

I'm just tired of people trying to force me into their lives where I don't belong.  I want to, so much, but I can see that it isn't working and I desperately need someone to cut the ties since it won't, can't, be me.  But they start to push me away, then suddenly reel me back in, and we're best friends,  the closest of confidants.  Then they move on to someone else and I'm being pushed back onto my shelf until their attention focuses on me again.

Like I'm waiting my turn for affection.

Is it supposed to be like that?

Okay, first, I would like to comment on how amazing it is that I am not crippled by now.  Seriously, considering the number of accidents that decide to occur upon me, I am extremly lucky to be able to walk at all.  Here's what really made me realize this.

First, yesterday was our swimming championships (in which I got first place during the 200 free and dropped ten seconds off my origional time. woo!!).  I was thinking about them in science and didn't notice the water on the floor and... shwoop! on my back.  which was painful.  Vaughan came running over, trying to look worried while laughing pulled me back up while my teacher had an annerism in the corner.

later, when we were doing relays at the beginning of the meet, there was another accident.  this one, i am pleased to say, was not my fault.  I was swimming back and I guess the girl behind me just got a little too excited... and dived in too soon... right onto me. which was also painful.

why is everyone so determined to crush my spinal cord???

also, today in gym we ran the mile.  It's weird, because in the water i could swim a mile in about four minutes, but running, it took me 10:18, which isn't so bad considering that at the beginning of the year, i was 12:53.  The only thing that really pissed me off was that Greg, of all people, outran me by about two minutes.  So i tripped him for revenge.

Another reason that I am proud: I finally finished my essay.  Yeah, the one that was assigned about three weeks ago? I just sat down tonight and did it, so now it's over with and I can hurry up and get an F.  But at least it's off my back.

okay, bad joke.

but get this: when I came downstairs to use the computer and write my essay, my little sister was on the computer.  when I told her I needed on, she goes, "Ugh, fine, but don't close my webkinz."  But apparently if you don't play webkinz for about half and hour, it automatically closes, which I found out when I got off and she started screaming "YOU JERK, YOU CLOSED MY WEBKINZ!" and started crying.  after a while, i kinda got pissed and told her to shut up.  then my dad came thundering down and sent us both to our rooms, where my sister stayed for another four hours, crying the whole time.  It must be all the hot air in her head condensing.

I can't decide which is worse: finding out your social studies teacher was at that last swim meet, or trying to face him after finding out.  I was talking to Lyss about my little 'misshap' and she was like, "You know Mr. M was there, right?"  I think i just about threw up.  So I walked in and he goes,

"Congradulations to our swimmers for winning their last meet!" while staring about three feet to the left of my head and smiling at his poster of thomas jefferson.  i pretended i was looking for a pencil, stuck my head in my purse, and waited to die.  fate was not so kind.  but it has gotten a little better.  We've progressed to him staring at my forehead whenever I talk (i kept thinking i had a zit or something).

however, that is not what I wanted to talk about.  why is it that almost all of my humiliating moments happen during some kind of sport?  Am i just sport deficient?  Unperceptive?  Retarded?  Well, which ever one it is, it all amounts to the same thing: bleachers hurt.

my class is doing fitness walking in gym, so my gym teacher had everyone running up and down the football stadium bleachers.  And i slipped... and I fell... all the way down, over the railing, and right on top of the quaterback who's in my gym class. 

in all regards, it SHOULD have been a bit more movie like.  You know, girl is caught by exceedingly handsome guy who falls in love with her on sight. but no.  life hates me too much.  Instead, I rolled over the railing, onto his head, which smashed into the field. 

it's not broken or anything, but its now a lovely shade of blue and every time i pass him in the hall he scowls at me as I go hobbling past him with bruises all down my back (its now practically blue).  anyway, after he was concious again (which only took like two seconds... gezus, im not that heavy) the gym teacher, who ran down the bleachers after with half the class in tow while all the guys came running from the field, she pushed him off me and goes

"Alex, are you okay?"  and it was just so funny with everyone staring at me like some rare specimin, waiting for my next astonishing prononcment.  so i started laughing. which was a mistake.

"Oh my god, she's delusional.  cameron (the guy i fell on) help me carry her."  so cameron carried me to the nurses office and dumped me on the bed before going back outside which the nurse came in and made me spell my name and tell me my phone number and whole buch of other stalkerish info before she let me go.  and then i had a ton of people who don't even know my name "Oh gosh, are you okay? I was so worried!"

pffftt. silly people.

Dear god.

I will never again be able to show my face at another swim meet.  Today just kinda sucked all around.  First, I forgot to pack my bathing suit it my swim bag (I know, I know) so my mom dropped it off for me at the attendance office in a brown paper bag with my name on it.  A girl in my spanish class, Savannah, saw it there and picked it up for me.  Apparently, she set in on the floor next to me at lunch, but didn't say anything to me about it. (Seriously, who DOES that?  She's too nice for her own good.)  So, I didn't see it and walked off without it.  On my way to LA, she saw me in the hall and was like, "Oh, yeah, did you get that paper bag?  For some reason it had a swim suit in it..."  And I just stood there and started at her for a minute, then said, SHIT! and ran to class.

So, then I had to ask Mr. B for a pass to go back to the lunch room.  he gave me a weird look, but i must've done well on my last vocab test, because he have me the hall pass.  Then I ran up to the lunch room: no brown bag.  I asked the custodian where she would have put it, and she goes, "Lost and found, where d'you think, dumbass?" No, I'm not exagerating.  So I ran to both lost and founds: there's on in the front of the school, and one in the waaaaaayyyy back.   And as I was walking back to class, I realized that since it was in a lunch bag it had probably been thrown away. 

After a lovely long round of cussing during which my SS teacher came out and was like "WHAT did you just say???" I went to the attendance office and used their phone to call my mom.  So after her round of cussing, she said she'd drop another bathing suit off for my swim meet.  During science, two periods later, some random teacher came in and said, "I'm looking for Ali?" and dangles my bathing suit in front of the whole class, who immediately turn to look at me.  So I got that back from him, but the worst part has yet to come.

My bathing suit was a competition suit.  It was more like a stripper-beach suit because it was ridiculously low cut.  So, all through the meet, I kept having to hitch it back up.  However, for the last event, which was a relay, the girl before me was really slow, so when I finally got in, I was all by myself. 

With no one to distract the crowds gaze from me.

And of course, that was when, on the way back, my boobs lept out of my suit and practically hit me in the face (hence the header). So i was trying to swim and cover my chest at the same time, and im pretty sure the whole room got an eyeful.

At the very least, I hope they enjoyed it...

Wow, it really has been a while since I posted.  Sorry about that ^.^"  A buttload has happened though.  To start, I got a boyfriend.  Then I ended up breaking up with him after, like, two days.  He was just too much of a brother to me, and I wasn't attracted to him at all.  Also, Vaughan returned to school.  She's doing pretty well, all things considered. 

We also got the floors mostly installed in the house.  There's wood floors in the entry way, the living room, the dining room, and both hall closets.  Its amazing, the house echos when you talk.  That will probably go away when we move the furniture back in.  Right now, it's all been crammed into the kitchen, along with the dog.  As I type this, my back is pressed against the piano, and it kinda hurts.  There's also carpet in both new bedrooms, we're still waiting for the guy to come back and finish the hallway and the landing.

Fourth, tomorrow, I'm going to DC to visit the holocaust museum with the rest of the advanced LA class.  All together, im gonna be on a bus for about ten hours with Caro, Chan-chan, and Abby.  Caro and I are next to each other, with Chan-chan and Abby in front of us.  Oh, its a charter bus, so they're gonna be playing movies and giving us food and crap, thank god.  I still have all of this weekend's and tomorrow's homework to do. -.- I should probably get started on that soon.

Anyway, for the bus ride, i'm trying to convince my mom to let me borrow her new PDA. Its amazing, and i want to download some inuyasha onto it to watch for when I get bored.  They said no personal DVD players, but its not a DVD player, its a palm pilot, so HAH!  But my mom's being kinda stubborn about it... she'll come around eventually. Maybe.

I'm so tired right now.  I really need a hug.  Not one of those one armed, okaylater hugs, a proper one.  I also feel kinda guilty about Josh (the boyfriend I dumped).  I just don't like him that way, but i'm here wishing for a nice hug from a guy.  The mean thing is, he just isn't physically attractive to me.  At all.  I mean I'm not fit or beautiful or anything, so I don't have any right to talk, but I can always hope...

Later days

Okay, once you read this, you won't really find the heading very funny.  It's not really, it's... insensitive.  Why?  One of my friend's dad died last Tuesday.  Vaughan (my friend) found out Thusday night.  He died last Sunday. Of electricution.  and it took them another two days to find his body, then another two to get the news to the family.  I just got home from the viewing.  I was only there about fifteen minutes, but I'm so relieved to see her.  I've been fretting all weekend.  I'm not close enough to her to justify coming to her house, buy we're close enough that she's been over my house and I hers.  She's no where near well, but she's much better than I thought she'd be.  I just can't shake this overwhelming relief that she's surrounded by people who love her and that even if she breaks down, she knows how many people, including me, would jump off a cliff to catch her.  I didn't know her dad at all, but when I found out friday, I was just like, "What?" I was seriously waiting for someone to say they were joking.  It's just... unimaginable that it could happen.  Especially to her.

God, you son of a whoring bitch, You have a lot to answer for.  Until then, the people who care about Vaughan will take care of her until You can get Your head out of Your ass and start taking care of the race You created.